Lunatics and Princesses

From Metaquotes (by way of misscam and tryell:

"Al Qaeda says: 'Britain is now burning with fear, terror and panic in its northern, southern, eastern, and western quarters.' Bitch, please. Osama, you live in a fucking cave. You're like an evil Batman or something. No wonder you have a thing for blowing up commuters, because you will never commute because you live in a cave. You see transport, and you are filled with rage, because you? Live in a cave. You could try forming a political wing to... oh, wait, you can't because YOU LIVE IN A CAVE. Twat.

The BBC paused news coverage to show *Eastenders*. That'd be the nationwide fear, terror and panic, then."

I love the British. And I am so a sucker for Eastenders, even though I usually have no idea what's going on and can't make out what they're saying half the time since the mics they use pick up background noise.

Also, yay for the British not being drama queens like Americans generally are. <3 London!

...

I am exhausted and very upset right now. Exhausted because I took two Benadryl and went to bed at midnight- wooooo six hours of sleep. Very upset because I tried to buy a pair of cargo pants online and the only size left that they have available is a 0.

Cargo pants are stupidly hard to locate when they're out of style. WTF, retailers? Why are you trying to torture me? Don't you know that my only pair of cargo pants has a huge rip in them?

...

I'm also very overwhelmed. Overwhelmed because there really isn't any way for me to move out, financially speaking... Technically, I could do rent no problem, but the more I think about it, the less the whole thing seems to work. Namely because even though I'll have a job to pay for stuff, I'm still taking an insane, full time course load- and this leaves for how many hours? And the jobs around here suck. Unless I can take out an extra loan or something, maybe. I have to save for Jeannette's wedding, too. Which wouldn't be too bad, except I have to save enough for four plane tickets, hotel, car rental, blah blah blah.

However, I can't stay here. That's not going to work at all. I am not going out of my mind like I have the past two semesters, with trying to stay on top of everything with a dementedly limited commuting schedule. I told Mom yesterday that if I'm going to stay here, I'm going to need a heavy mix of ritalin and zoloft just to stay sane and focused. Besides, I'll be gone all the time anyway.

I think I'm just exhausted by the thought of work and school and studying, all at the same time. Because that's all that I'm going to be doing. Working and studying. At home, all I do is commute and study. So it's really like trading off one evil for another, and that's fine. But throw in getting to Arizona on top of it all, and I'm a nervous wreck. A nervous wreck with no social life, lol.

I wish my brain would stop thinking and being generally pessimistic for like, two seconds. Cargo pants would help, but there are none, dammit.

First, I hope that everyone in Britain on my friends list is okay. I hope that your families and loved ones are all right, too.

The bombings were the first thing on the news this morning. Hell of a thing to wake up to. Why do these things always happen first thing in the morning? Or why do I always wind up hearing about them first thing in the morning?

I don't get it. I seriously, truly just don't get it. Terrorism is only effective in the immediate sense- that is, when you're involved in a bombing or something, you might panic or something. What about after people calm down? I was watching BBC World a little while ago, and in all the video they showed of Londoners this afternoon, people were quietly walking to wherever they had to go. There was no mass hysteria, no fear, no breakdown of their system or society. If that's the aftermath of a terrorist attack, then what the hell is the point of doing it in the first place?

Obviously, the public reaction increases or decreases depending on the scale of the incident itself. But even for gigantic things like September 11th... shit, the rest of the country went on doing what it was doing the day before, even if New York and Washington were shut down. No one hid in their houses for days on end. Day to day life didn't change at all unless you were directly involved. Well, things changed, but the country didn't go straight to hell (unless you count the Patriot Act. And I highly doubt that the terrorists' aim was to push that piece of legislation through.)

Does it suck? Yeah. Big time. Is it upsetting? Of course it is. Bombs, attacks, death tolls; all of those things and everything that accompanies them is scary and disconcerting.
But these are the British, for god's sake. One of the toughest, most defiant, self-controlled, muddle-through-anything-and-come-out-on-top groups of people in the entire world. That really says something for the intellegence of the terrorists. Namely, that if they're trying to terrorize someone, they're better off picking people who would be easily terrorized. Fucktards. God.

I don't know. I'm kind of upset, in a weird, peripheral sort of way. Maybe I'm more disturbed than upset. The whole thing just reminds me of the strange times we live in, where nothing is simple and everything is hopelessly screwed up. I can't see any ways to fix this. Sometimes I find myself wishing that the doomsayers are right and these are the Last Days or whatever, just so everything will end and the stupid pointless violence will stop. Thoughts like that just make me cynical and bitter. I hate feeling like that.

Please excuse my rambling. I feel all mixed up.