(no subject)

Stupid day is stupid

I've tried very hard to avoid the 9/11 nonsense. Hell, I've trying to avoid it since its second anniversary, because I find it trite, annoying, and a giant reopening of old wounds that just drives me crazy and makes me irrationally angry. I like my anger, though, as it's a very useful coping mechanism for me. This being the tenth anniversary and all, I've done everything I can to go to ground, since a lot of people don't understand why I get mad about them caterwauling about 9/11 and rememberance and all that crap, and it's easier for me not to deal with them, and them not to deal with me, and everyone goes home happy. Luckily (kind of? ugh) Binghamton has had to deal with catastrophic flooding since Wednesday, so all of the engergy that would normally go into 9/11 malingering has been going into, you know, flood relief and constructive stuff like that. Awesome.

So I figured I'd be okay if I just kind of hid out today. It was working well until I was halfway through dinner. I was flipping through channels on tv and came across the Princess Diaries. I was like, "Oh, this came out ten years ago, when I was still happy" and then I thought about life pre-9/11 and burst into tears with a hunk of garlic bread in my mouth. Choked on it and couldn't stop crying.

Thank god I'm vain. I thought about how stupid I must look and got myself under control.

Now I'm angry again. Fuck terrorists, and fuck 9/11. I lose my dignity for NO ONE. ARRRRRRRRRRRGH. FUCK.

Stupid day is stupid

I've tried very hard to avoid the 9/11 nonsense. Hell, I've trying to avoid it since its second anniversary, because I find it trite, annoying, and a giant reopening of old wounds that just drives me crazy and makes me irrationally angry. I like my anger, though, as it's a very useful coping mechanism for me. This being the tenth anniversary and all, I've done everything I can to go to ground, since a lot of people don't understand why I get mad about them caterwauling about 9/11 and rememberance and all that crap, and it's easier for me not to deal with them, and them not to deal with me, and everyone goes home happy. Luckily (kind of? ugh) Binghamton has had to deal with catastrophic flooding since Wednesday, so all of the engergy that would normally go into 9/11 malingering has been going into, you know, flood relief and constructive stuff like that. Awesome.

So I figured I'd be okay if I just kind of hid out today. It was working well until I was halfway through dinner. I was flipping through channels on tv and came across the Princess Diaries. I was like, "Oh, this came out ten years ago, when I was still happy" and then I thought about life pre-9/11 and burst into tears with a hunk of garlic bread in my mouth. Choked on it and couldn't stop crying.

Thank god I'm vain. I thought about how stupid I must look and got myself under control.

Now I'm angry again. Fuck terrorists, and fuck 9/11. I lose my dignity for NO ONE. ARRRRRRRRRRRGH. FUCK.