Lunatics and Princesses

Sometimes I think about being the main villain. Final Fantasy style- all that destroy the world, badass nonsense.

I think my outfit would be some kind of take on Snape's.

I might just really like the sleeves.







I'm so fucking tired. My brain is shut down, I have all this work to do and a midterm tomorrow, and all I can think is that I want to be the bad guy so I can have Snape sleeves.

*faceplant*

Discussed: necrophilia and bestiality in the context of bets with a lot of money involved

Recieved: a packet of salt down the back of my pants

Danced: in the bathroom to get it out of the legs of my jeans

Got: a blood blister on my finger where Alisha jammed it against a window frame by accident after I tied her shoelaces together and then she dumped a packet of salt down my shirt so I had to get retaliation, right?

Spilled: apple juice all over the floor and my feet

Heard: a pretty good rock band

Talked: about BDSM in all of its wonder with Paul

Thought: that Alisha was going to pull a Princess Beauty and go to the opera with nipple clamps and other sex toys on under her dress

Cannot choose: a username for Kings of Chaos, so I can be an officer in Quinn's army

[Think will go with Axel Grease]

I'm skipping chem lab to work on my speech. Which is probably a good thing, since I didn't finish the lab that is due today last night. I'll tackle it again once the speech is finished.

God, I wish this semester was over. It wouldn't be so hard if I had a computer at home to do homework on and the bus ride didn't eat up a huge chunk of the day. Next semester is only going to get harder, but I'll be able to handle it after a summer quasi-off. I don't know when summer class I'm going to take, but it won't be until August. Other than said class, I'm just going to study algebra and trig on my own, and try to learn enough Greek and Latin to get by next semester. [Note to self: keep up with French and start Japanese.]

The weather is warming up now, so I started running again last night. Without the iPod, sadly, but Anita is bringing in her laptop tomorrow because there's no firewalls stopping her from uploading songs onto the iPod on it. Bless her.

OH YEAH!! Lisa is coming up this weekend, too. There will be anime, and there will be Boondock Saints, and there will probably be Smirnoff Twisted and Wegman's after midnight for some stockboy madness! She's coming to classes with me tomorrow, so there will probably be many CSI jokes (my CRJ class is in the mini-crime lab at school.) We will also probably stalk Cowboy Nick.

[Note to self: Stop calling him Nick]

Madama Butterfly list (tix have been reserved, yay! I need $20 from everyone by Monday morning at the latest, aiight? Anywho, crossed out people have already paid me. Everyone else- give me your money or ELSE!!!! MUAH HA HA HA HA!!!! LOVE ME AND DESPAIR!!!!! *facedesk*)

Feather
Kelsey
Quinn
Manda
Jason 1
Jason 2
Alisha
Joe
Jason 2's Mom
Feather's Mom

Yeah. Yeah, I really think it is.

Everything I needed to know about how hot Manda is I learned in my bed on Friday night and because of Billy Fucillo I wound up stuck underneath said bed. I am a lion [insert rawr here] but there is no photographic evidence of this; Manda is a fish and there's no evidence of that, either, except the scales on the floor. Spoons make great microphones and breakfast is only good at eleven at night when you buy it and eat nothing on the plate but the toast. Steal milkshakes whenever possible. Buy cheap slutty makeup and always remember that your friends are there to help you into your corset.

Paris Hilton is not the only person who can say, "That's hot," and make it look good.

Apocalypse Now is really, really long. If you are scientifically inclined, it will give you dreams of covalent bonding when you fall asleep in the middle of it.

Sharing couches is fun. Hip bones are fun too.

Zombie attacks do happen and one should be prepared for them. When zombies fall asleep, they tend to snore. Also, they steal all the covers, but it's their own fault for wearing fishnet shirts. It's not my fault my house is chilly.

When everyone wakes up in the morning, the best plan of action is to say you lost track of the time and put in another movie to cover up the mini "OMG you weren't supposed to sleep over!" conspiracy. The parents were cool with it in the end, and I managed to gloss over the situation with offerings of homemade biscuits.

Tarot readings are always educational and various goddesses screamed at the boys. But boys never listen. Never, never, never, and sometimes it takes a psychic kick in the ass to get them to do so. However, when you're the channel, it hurts like a bitch.

Zombie-ism is a learned trait and can be taught to other people to use as a ploy on unsuspecting girlfriends.

Boys make funny noises when you nibble on their earlobes.

So do girls.

There is a certain sense of irony and poetic justice in tying up a Griffyndor with a Slytherin scarf and torturing her. But she danced like a white girl, so she deserved it. We're working on fixing this problem.

The total for the pizza came to $22.35. This may or may not be important, since I had $38 in my account and now have $2. WTF?????

Donnie Darko may be a good movie. I'm not entirely sure, as I only caught little bits and pieces of it. I was distracted. I talked to Andy on the phone on Saturday. I'm not entirely sure what we talked about. I was distracted. Something about a hard hat fashion show- there might be heavy machinery there too.

Four way makeouts are fun, but can get unnerving when you don't know whose hands (exactly) were... never mind.

Eventually people went home and I went to sleep. Cue Sunday.

Nothing notable happened at work except that Connor and Victor took it upon themselves to dismember and eviscerate me with FisherPrice saws and then hammer me back together again. Charming children, just charming.

"Be Cool" is a great movie. Uma Thurman is hot. Uma Thurman dancing is hotter. The Black Eyed Peas rule me, since they provide music for the dance lessons I'm going to continue to give Manda whether she likes it or not.

People put up with my shit and that amazes me. Tom is famous and the paparazzi never leaves him alone.

Hey guys. Tango lessons!!!!

Every Tuesday night
Suds Factory on Clinton Street
7-9pm argentine tango, 9-11pm salsa
Cost: free

"You can't write in binary code. It's like, impossible!"
~ The Kid Sitting In The Booth Behind Me

Not true. I wrote "critical de-salinization point" in binary code a few months ago after watching the Day After Tomorrow with Kate and Shane.

Score one for the geek sitting by herself.

I hereby declare neongreenleaf my All-Encompassing Snog-Wench and Online GoGo Yubari Stand-In.

Also, when I take over the world, she can be the Princess of the North Eastern United States and the Azores Islands, if she so wishes.

“Yee-haw and Merry Fucking Christmas.” ~ Joanie

Merry Christmas and all that jazz. I hope you all got lots of stuff, and ate lots of stuff that you didn’t need to eat, and then went to the movies since that’s the only thing left to do, unless you’re at a family reunion-type holiday thing, in which case you’re probably arguing with someone or other.

The last week and half or so has been somewhat overwhelming. So I’m going to tell you all about it, except backwards from today, since I just want to shout from the rooftops that I am now the proud owner of a Legolas T-Shirt.

There’s something very gratifying about having an androgynous, sexy, beautiful elf with an admirable grasp of the obvious plastered across your boobs. It says something. Something like “I am a fangirl.” *squees* (see also: “I am a dork.”)

We all made out like bandits this year. I got two new sweatshirts and a sweater that’s kind of bizzare but really pretty. It reminds me kind of what the women in Minas Tirith were wearing. Dad picked it out for me when we were getting Mom’s present last night at TJ Maxx. I tried it on while I was wrapping it and it looks pretty good.

Nana got me a Jester hat to wear to the Gathering in Toronto. Never mind that it was last week. Mom told her that I was going as an elf, and she’s all, “Yes! It’s the perfect elf hat! But there’s no bells on it.” Lol. She also made my sister and I a scrapbook of our entire lives to date, which is really cool; there’s lots of pictures in there that I haven’t seen before, and she adds in little comments underneath the pictures like, “Why did they put the flowers in my best pot?”

*dances around happily* But the best present I got was a gift certificate for my bow! Kelsey actually got hers this morning under the tree, but they only had one in stock so I have to wait a week to get mine. Dad won’t let us get the arrows until spring, though, since he doesn’t want anyone getting maimed. *dances again* I am SO EXCITED!!!!

That was all this morning, which began by Kelsey screaming in my ear and waving her bow in my face.

Last night was kind of delusional. We decided to skip church and just stay home instead. Mom started reading that passage out of the Bible that she does every year that we stay home, with the glory unto you blah blah blah except she was using the stupid Good News Bible. So the story was simplified to the point of, “Mary was pregnant. They went to Bethlehem to be taxed. The Angel scared the shepherds. Blah blah, woof woof.” It was incredebly stupid, and we were all cracking up, so Mom finally got the other Bible and read out of that. Rockin’ with the fancy language. Verily I beseech thee, show me the way to Camillus.

Before that I fell asleep during the Nutcracker. I managed to stay awake through most of it, but the Sugar Plum Fairy pas de deux is really kind of tedious. She just does the same thing over and over again to really slow music. The next thing I know Mom is shaking me awake and trying to shove fudge down my throat.

Okay, rewind. Return of the King!

Okay. All I have to say about the movie itself is this: I loved it, however, I think they tried to jam too much into the end, but I also think that the EE will straighten out the end lumps. Pippin rocks my socks. I never paid that much attention to him before, but wow! He’s one of my favorite characters in this trilogy now.

Overload with the eye candy. Had to put up with acerbic comments from Justin telling my not to cream my pants when Legolas came on the screen in a tiara. Bastard.

Legolas was pretty but useless. However, he was pretty but useless in the books too, so I guess in some weird way PJ stayed true to the orignals in that.

Actually getting to the movie a challenge. Eventually we all got there- way after we were supposed to, so we wound up way down in front and on the side- even with Magoo hitting Justin’s car with his truck in the parking lot. My idiot sister insisted that she had to buy popcorn and so missed most of the previews. Due to Kelsey, Anastasia, and my mother being in the snack line (the other two trying to talk her out of it) they lost their seats. (Kate let them go to two random guys.) So they had to sit in the first row next to the wall and my mother wound up in the back someplace. She was really pissed about that.

No one got much sleep. Tom crashed on our couch for a while. This was due to the Gathering Ball.

Okay, so, we left B’ville at noon on Tuesday. Drove up to Canada, perfectly fine, okay. When we got the border the customs guy asked us where we were going, and then informed us that our event had started at one thirty and we were just a bit late. Patiently explained that it was a three day thing with lots of events, and we were only doing one and it started at six.

Drove on to Toronto. We listened to Kate’s tape of the “Rite of Spring”- possibly one of the most disurbing pieces of classical music ever written- and got on the wrong highway going north because they don’t seem to label exit numbers in Toronto. Finally got out of the hellish traffic and turned around to drive to Queen Street and find the hotel. When we got there they didn’t check out confirmation numbers or anything, just handed us our tickets and wham! that was it. So we rushed into the bathrooms, changed into our costumes, and headed out to find the shuttle bus but wound up taking a taxi instead.

Costumage: Jim went as a knight of Gondor, Tom went as Aragorn, Kate went as a Modern Elbereth, and I went as Arwen.

Jim’s costume: Handmade chainmail coat (drool) and a cloak and stuff. It was really cute, kind of non-specifiic but really nice. Tom’s costume: Aragorn’s battle outfit, with the cloak, the tree jerkin, and red shirt. His was awesome; it came out really good, especially the tree, which was really impressive, all silver lamé. He had the wig to go with it, which was cool. He really looked like Aragorn :-D Kate’s costume was a bit edgier; a tight, low-plunging blue dress over black leather pants with a rhinestone diadem. She was definetly the hottest thing on the dance floor. My costume was cool too, I guess- Arwen’s dress from the Two Towers, the periwinkle dream gown. It’s really simple, so… yeah. It’s in the movie, if you want to know what it looked like, lol.

So we danced the night away (or at least I did. I danced till I couldn’t lift my feet up off the floor anymore. Hee!) to an awesome band (Glass Hammer.)

There were absolutely gorgeous costumes there, including on Aragorn that was an exact movie replica, down to the embossed plate armor, two girls dressed up as the Argonath, a Sam pulling a Gollum around on a leash, and last but not least CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW!!!!! Which was the fucking best part. Oh, that was cool.

Of course, being a schmuck I forgot my camera. Bastards.

The rest of this entry will be finished later, I guess, since my sister and I are off to see Peter Pan now.

Tra la la, all you beautiful people. *blows kisses*

THINGS NOT TO DO DURING "RETURN OF THE KING"

1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait...where in
the world is Harry Potter?"

2. Block the entrance to the theater while screaming: "YOU SHALL NOT
PASS!" - After the movie, say "Lucas could have done it better."

3. Wonder out loud if Aragorn is going to run for governor of California.

4. Point and laugh whenever someone dies.

5. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts.

6. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson."

7. When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and at the top of your lungs
sing, "I did it.... MY way...!"

8. Talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, bite off someone's
finger and fall down the stairs.

9. Dress up as old ladies and reenact "The Battle of Helms Deep" Monty
Python style.

10. When Denethor lights the fire, shout "Barbecue!"

11. In TTT when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout "RUN
FOREST, RUN!"

12. Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien
about!" See how long it takes before you get kicked out of the theatre.

13. During a wide shot of a battle, inquire, "Where's Waldo?"

14. Talk loudly about how you heard that there is a single frame of a
nude Elf hidden somewhere in the movie.

15. Start an Orc sing-a-long.

16. Come to the premiere dressed as Dr. Frank-N-Furter and wander around
looking terribly confused.

17. When they go in the paths of the dead, wait for tense moment and
shout, "I see dead people!"

18. Imitate what you think a conversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda
would be like.

19. Release a jar of daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob
scene.

20. When Shelob comes on, exclaim, "Man! Charlotte's really let herself
go!"

So it looks like we’re going to miss Mars, and all. Oh well.

It’ll be back again in five thousand years. I can wait.

……………………………………….

Woke up this morning to Dad yelling up the stairs in the direction of my bed. This would have been normal, had he been saying something along the lines of, “Dead people, get up. Wake up, duh-head.” But no, this time he was telling me how if I was going to save the world I was going to have to get in shape and start training, and doing boxing, and lots of pull ups. My first coherent thought was “I won’t do pull ups. I don’t want butch muscles!” and I told him so. He said I wasn’t going to get butch muscles, but if I had to haul myself upside down up or down a cliff face I would be able to do so.

My second thought was, “Oh shit. This means I’m going to have to learn to drive stick.”

My third thought was, “I’m never renting Tomb Raider again.”

It gives him Ideas, I found out. He reads waaaaaay too much into the planetary alignment thing.

You know, though, it’s funny. Usually I’m the one reading into things, and trying to be what I’m not, or do something that’s not mainstream. Dad’s usually the one telling me that I’m not Elektra, stop pretending, you can never do that, go to school and if I see sais in the house again you’re toast. However, this situation is reversed. I’m shooting him down and being skeptical at every turn, and he’s getting all excited about every little thing.

*rolls eyes* Whatever. No more Lara Croft. As much as I’d like to be her, I’m not. I’m just starting to come to terms with that- being normal, and having a normal life with no quests, magical powers, or any kind of swash-buckling adventure- so don’t fuck with it.

Arrgh. Think that about sums it up.

LOTR TTT MUSIC!!!! YESSSS!!!!

Soundtrack is out. I have yet to buy it but I downloaded "the Evenstar" and a "Requiem for the King" remix, and I fucking love it.

It just screams dance solo.

I have LOTR tickets.

I need a life, I think. And elf ears.

The New Girl likes Harry Potter. She likes fanfiction. Don't know if she likes slash or not.

I asked (jokingly) my mom what her favorite slash pairing was.

She thought about it for a minute and then said, "Harry and Draco. But I really like Mulder/Krychek."

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My mom is so damn COOL. But then she threw me for a loop by saying something about Snape/Hagrid. Ewwwww.

Ewwwww.

Maybe I'll be more coherent later.

Maybe not.